Can't seem to breathe.

I feel lost tonight. In a funk. It's more than that though. I guess I could blame it on my lack of antidepressants, but why do I need chemicals to be antidepressed? The darkness is closer to me now, the lack of light heavier. Hopelessness makes it hard to breathe, and I just don't see what is so wrong with me.

"Tell them to look up". Why can't I remember to look up?

Wake up, you're alive. We're on your side. Rescue is possible. You aren't alone.

But I AM alone tonight. My thoughts conspire against my will. I feel numb. I can't seem to breathe.

But I can bleed.

I do not want to die inside
just to breathe in...
i'm tired
of feeling so numb...
relief exists, I find it when...

[I am cut]

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