My life's parable
I am walking hand in hand with you. We do this often. I look at you and say, "Daddy, the sun is hot. Make it not be so hot!" "Here, we can cool off in here," you say, and lead me to a river. I look at you and grin. Picking up a rock, I throw it into the water. "Come on, Daddy!" I tell you. You smile and lead me through the river. I turn and look back. "Look what we did, Daddy! The river was big, but we crossed it!" "We did, indeed," you say. You smile.
Some weeks later, we are walking along. The wind begins to howl and I start to shiver. "I'm cold, Daddy. So cold," I say. "There is shelter here," you say. You lead me to a small cave. "Let me hold you so you stay warm," you say. I curl up in your arms. I am warm. I am safe. Later, I say to you, "Look what you did, Daddy! I was cold but you sheltered me! Did you see what you did, Daddy?" You smile. "Of course I saw it, silly," you say. I laugh, and you laugh with me.
A few months later we are walking again. "I'm tired, Daddy. Carry me?" You smile. "Come on, then. But just until we get through the tall grass." I climb on your back and you carry me easily through the brush. Finally, we are on smoother ground. You set me down. I turn and look. "Wow, that was some really tall grass. I made it, though, didn't I? Did you see? Did you see what I did, Daddy?" You just look at me.
A few months later again, we are walking. I keep running ahead of you. "Be careful," you say. "I've been here before, I remember where to step," I tell you. I turn and run again. "Be careful," you say. "I've got this!" I tell you. "Wait for me," you say. "Hurry up!" I tell you. I turn and run again. I hear you calling my name, but I don't stop. I'm not that far away. Besides, I know where to step.
I turn a few minutes later, but I've outrun you. My heart beats a little faster. But for some reason, I don't wait. For some reason, I don't turn back. I want to explore what's ahead. I move on.
Hours later, I am stumbling along. I seem to be lost, but I'm not really worried. Suddenly, I trip on a rock, and fall into the water. The current sweeps me away. I feel as though I'm drowning. A branch scratches my face, and I grab it. I pull myself out of the water. I trudge along. A few hours later, the sun is beating down on me; it's too hot, too bright. Night falls, and the wind whips around me. I start to shiver. I find a small cave in the nearby mountain and I hide. Alone in my cave, I'm still cold. I cry. I hide, and I cry. I want you to come get me. Outside my cave, wild animals roam. I close my eyes. "They aren't there," I tell myself.
Morning, after the longest night of my life. What is that? I can hear something, it almost sounds like you. I begin to feel so relieved. It's you! You've come for me! I've missed you! You see me, and smile. You've missed me, too.
I stop. My smile fades. "Daddy, where were you?! You left me all alone!" I yell.
"I've been waiting for you to come back," you say. "I've waited all this time. I've been trying to find you, but you have wandered far."
I shake my head and cry, "No, you left me alone! I tripped on the rock that you put there, and I fell into the water! You didn't tell me about the current, and it swept me so far! You threw a stick in the water to hit my face! You sent the sun to make me hot, and the wind to make me cold. I found a damp hole to sleep in, and you sent wild animals to devour me. You don't love me! How could you leave me all alone?!"
Your face--it's so sad. Your eyes spill over with tears. Raw grief is etched in the lines of your face. You are quiet for so long.
"Answer me, Daddy! WHY?"
You look at me. Your hands reach for me. You speak softly, tearfully.
"My child, I didn't put that rock there. You ran so far ahead that I couldn't warn you about it. The water was deep and the current swift, but that is why I always held your hand. I grew the tree that had the branch that scratched you, but the branch was there to pull you out of the water, in case you ever got swept away by the current. I sent the sun to dry you, and the wind to cool you. I carved the cave to give you shelter. I sent the animals to keep you warm, but you feared them, so they kept watch over you instead. Oh, I love you. I love you so much that I paid the price for your wandering, and then I came to get you. I never left you. It was you who walked away. I have been trying to find you ever since."
Perception.
Some weeks later, we are walking along. The wind begins to howl and I start to shiver. "I'm cold, Daddy. So cold," I say. "There is shelter here," you say. You lead me to a small cave. "Let me hold you so you stay warm," you say. I curl up in your arms. I am warm. I am safe. Later, I say to you, "Look what you did, Daddy! I was cold but you sheltered me! Did you see what you did, Daddy?" You smile. "Of course I saw it, silly," you say. I laugh, and you laugh with me.
A few months later we are walking again. "I'm tired, Daddy. Carry me?" You smile. "Come on, then. But just until we get through the tall grass." I climb on your back and you carry me easily through the brush. Finally, we are on smoother ground. You set me down. I turn and look. "Wow, that was some really tall grass. I made it, though, didn't I? Did you see? Did you see what I did, Daddy?" You just look at me.
A few months later again, we are walking. I keep running ahead of you. "Be careful," you say. "I've been here before, I remember where to step," I tell you. I turn and run again. "Be careful," you say. "I've got this!" I tell you. "Wait for me," you say. "Hurry up!" I tell you. I turn and run again. I hear you calling my name, but I don't stop. I'm not that far away. Besides, I know where to step.
I turn a few minutes later, but I've outrun you. My heart beats a little faster. But for some reason, I don't wait. For some reason, I don't turn back. I want to explore what's ahead. I move on.
Hours later, I am stumbling along. I seem to be lost, but I'm not really worried. Suddenly, I trip on a rock, and fall into the water. The current sweeps me away. I feel as though I'm drowning. A branch scratches my face, and I grab it. I pull myself out of the water. I trudge along. A few hours later, the sun is beating down on me; it's too hot, too bright. Night falls, and the wind whips around me. I start to shiver. I find a small cave in the nearby mountain and I hide. Alone in my cave, I'm still cold. I cry. I hide, and I cry. I want you to come get me. Outside my cave, wild animals roam. I close my eyes. "They aren't there," I tell myself.
Morning, after the longest night of my life. What is that? I can hear something, it almost sounds like you. I begin to feel so relieved. It's you! You've come for me! I've missed you! You see me, and smile. You've missed me, too.
I stop. My smile fades. "Daddy, where were you?! You left me all alone!" I yell.
"I've been waiting for you to come back," you say. "I've waited all this time. I've been trying to find you, but you have wandered far."
I shake my head and cry, "No, you left me alone! I tripped on the rock that you put there, and I fell into the water! You didn't tell me about the current, and it swept me so far! You threw a stick in the water to hit my face! You sent the sun to make me hot, and the wind to make me cold. I found a damp hole to sleep in, and you sent wild animals to devour me. You don't love me! How could you leave me all alone?!"
Your face--it's so sad. Your eyes spill over with tears. Raw grief is etched in the lines of your face. You are quiet for so long.
"Answer me, Daddy! WHY?"
You look at me. Your hands reach for me. You speak softly, tearfully.
"My child, I didn't put that rock there. You ran so far ahead that I couldn't warn you about it. The water was deep and the current swift, but that is why I always held your hand. I grew the tree that had the branch that scratched you, but the branch was there to pull you out of the water, in case you ever got swept away by the current. I sent the sun to dry you, and the wind to cool you. I carved the cave to give you shelter. I sent the animals to keep you warm, but you feared them, so they kept watch over you instead. Oh, I love you. I love you so much that I paid the price for your wandering, and then I came to get you. I never left you. It was you who walked away. I have been trying to find you ever since."
Perception.
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